current mood: I NEED A JOB MOOD. Is there such mood? Bahh.

10:05 AM its so pathetic...
after having to plan everything..
and at the very last min...
the thing...
its juz not...
to wad u've expected it to be...
all ur hopes n dreams...
were DESTROYED...
totally...
juz imagine...
2 years of planning...
2 years of hoping...
2 years of waiting...
n now...
wen the results are out...
u're speechless...
coz u've never expected dat things...
would turn out to be this way...
its reali hard...
damn hard to accept the Harshness of reality...
but u cant do anything...
coz its true...
u mite have planned it...
but onli HE...
can decide where u'll end up...
u're trying to accept it...
wif the help of ur family members...close frens... n relatives
n as the daes passes by...
the hopes n dreams are getting far away from ya mindset...
however...
n UNFORTUNATELY...
the presence of unconsiderate people...
they were there...
not to guide or help u get out of this pathetic mess...
BUT...
destroying the strength dat u've built thru wif the help of ya loved ones...
u're confused...
upset...
torn into pieces...
then...
came a time...
where u told urself dat u're NOTHING...
but a LOSER..
a hopeless person...
to ur family..or maybe to the community...
n dat u've started having dreams..
dat u're planning a suicide...
coz u feel dat its of to no use if u're still living...
coz u're goin thru a very painful pathway...
dat no one else but u will have to bear the pain...
even if ur loved ones are tryin to help u thru...
u still feel dat u're a loser..
n it would have been better if u're dead right now...
nah..
u're not gonna plan suicide...
coz dats a reali reali shameful thing to do...
all u're doing now is waiting...
waiting for the moment...
a moment..
where u'll get all the people around u outta ur sight...
a moment...
where u dun get to hear the whispers of ur loved ones...
a moment...
where u wont be able to speak ur thoughts to anyone..
dats wad they say...
the moment dat everyone is scared to go thru...
n dat is the moment of ...
D.E.A.T.H.
its weird...
n its hard to be separated from ur loved ones...
but theres nothing else dat can make u feel peaceful...
other than dat...
onli dat can solve ur problem...